Ra One

“The most expensive mid-life crisis of  KIng Khan”
“Atrocious movie! Don’t even go there!”
“The most confused movie ever!”
This is all I’ve been hearing about Ra-One since its release.
Still curious, I booked tickets for the earliest available show. 11.30 am on a Tuesday. I dragged two of my equally curious friends to bunk work & come with me.
Don’t know if the Gods didn’t approve, but the sky darkened with rain clouds when I was just about to leave. I drove on in a snail’s pace in the heavy traffic.
At 11.15, I was still about 4 kms from the theatre. To take my mind off the the tension, I looked out of the window, drumming my fingers on the steering wheel.
A lungi-clad man was cajoling a lady in the platform. She pushed him away. he said something to her. Next second, she was beating her chest and bawling. In a trice, she was prone on the platform, rolling around, still beating her chest.

By the time I could make any sense of the scene I had to move on.

And then the rain came in torrents.

I couldn’t see what was in front of my car. Purely by intuition, I managed to reach the multiplex at 11.30. Panic-stricken I called my friends. They were still on their way, stuck in traffic at various parts of the city. After assuring them that I’ll come to the entrance to get them, I ran in with my tickets, umbrella & a soggy hand bag. Found my seat & settled down. Thank God, the movie had not started.

Anyway, once the movie started, all the comments in the beginning of this blog started coming to me in bits & pieces.

By then, my friends had joined me too & all three of us watched in horror as Shah Rukh Khan ate noodles with curds. With his hands. And spoke such terrible Tamil. (I’ve known white skins speak much better Tamil than that!)

What was he thinking? And as if he suddenly realised he’s offended the most seedha saadha of clans, he had to rope in Rajnikanth, just to stand around, so Kareena can worship him.

Come on! We’re not THAT stupid!

Anyway, while we got over all this & was seriously contemplating going back to work, it got funny. Not intentionally though. We just had to sit around to watch where this was going.

The villain from the game Shah Rukh designed comes alive! Ooh! Scary! He wants to kill Shah Rukh’s son! (Someone please give that boy a haircut!)

Shah Rukh dies valiantly, while saving his son.

And after a mad chase around London, which involves crashing into buses, toppling of cars in slow-mo & many such scenes, the villain corners Kareena & bad haired boy.

And guess who comes to the rescue?

G- One the hero from the game. Of course that’s played by Shah Rukh too.

The story gets crazier and crazier after that.

In a nutshell, after a few scenes of karva chauth, bithday parites, songs, dance & more fights later,  good triumphs over evil.

But I must admit, despite all the flaws in the story, this film is technically brilliant. Very slick & the special effects are stunning.

The songs are good too.

Watch it if:

1. You’re a die-hard Shah Rukh fan.

2. If you’re a naive 7 year old who loves video games.

3. If you desperately need something nonsensical to distract you from your woes.