How I got duped… again!

Disclaimer: The intent of this post is not to hurt any religious/caste/creed sentiments. But a honest depiction of my personal experience. All characters are 100% real.

I opened the door without even checking through the peep hole. Stupid me. Assuming it had to be my top-work maid who comes around that time.

At my doorstep stood two strangers in the garb of shastrigals. (Brahmin priests). The older one was rotund, with fierce eyes. The younger one was dark & thin with his shoulder-length hair loose.

One look at them and I knew what the visit was all about. Money.

“Are you a brahmin?” The older one asked me.

Totally baffled by this simple question, I blurted, “Yes.”

There began the melodrama.

“Did you know today is Mahasivaratri?” he asked.

“Umm, yes” I replied.

“We’re from _____ madam. We’re doing a yagna in _____ mandapam, in Maambalam. Can we come in?”

“No..” I replied quickly.”I’m very busy and don’t have the  time for this.”

The younger one looked at me with disdain. “You’re asking HIM not to enter your house?” he asked me angrily. “Do you have any idea who he is? He’s on TV everyday lecturing on spirituality. Don’t you recognise him?”

The older one looked suitably offended.

“We’ve never been to anybody’s house. He suddenly felt like blessing your house and you will not even let him in?”

And before I knew it, they’d pushed the door open and the older one had made himself comfortable on the sofa and the younger one stood reverentially by his side.

Then followed a full-throated recital of some slokas in Sanskrit.

Totally taken aback, I stared at them dumb-truck.

“What is your birth star?”

I told them.

“Your husband’s?”

I told them.

By now I was sweating a bit and wondering if they were genuine god-men or just some run of the mill con-men.

And they used this fear pretty well. The older one shot me dagger looks once in a while,  seated as he was, majestically while the younger one did most of the talking.

‘What is your gothram?” (lineage)

I told my husband’s.

Now it was their turn to look dumb-struck.

Because this was definitely not a tambrahm lineage.

“Telungala?” (are you a Telugu?) the older one asked.

“No. ” I replied. “My husband is.”

Comprehension dawned.

‘Siva, Siva!’ I could hear them think. ‘Love marriage!!!’

You married as per your wish?” the younger one asked.

“Yes.” I answered defensively. “Do you have any problems with that, knowing me for precisely 5 minutes?” I wanted to ask.

“Never mind.” The younger one conceded. “Despite that you’ll have a happy marriage.” He said magnanimously.

Before I could think of giving him my best scathing reply, he asked me, “Any children?’

By now my mom-in-law joined me, having heard the loud recitals in the drawing room.

“One son.” I told him, gritting my teeth.

“Birth star?”

I told him.

After some nimble calculations he informed me, “Brilliant boy. Has an amazing memory. But has a very bad temper. Am I correct?” he asked me.

I had to grudgingly admit it was indeed very accurate.

He had a handful of  yellow rice. The younger one gestured I should fall at the older one’s feet.

By now my patience was wearing really thin. I just did a mock namskaram while he proceeded to throw the rice on my head.

He shifted his focus on my mom-in-law.

To be continued. (Since this is getting too long!)

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11 Comments

  1. kapil said,

    February 20, 2010 at 7:30 pm

    so far its been well! but how did-ja get duped again?
    awaiting!

    patience!!!

  2. Gradwolf said,

    February 21, 2010 at 8:16 am

    Woah, was it really someone from one of those morning shows?

    don’t think so!!

  3. anusha srikanth said,

    February 21, 2010 at 12:30 pm

    unbelievable!LOL!

    😀

  4. Lavanya said,

    February 22, 2010 at 7:48 am

    can totally relate to it ! used to happen in my parents home before i was married and every time i used to duck inside and will come out only after they leave. Most of them are not genuine 😦

    😦 looks like that’s the case here too…

  5. maami said,

    February 22, 2010 at 9:47 am

    This is not about how duplicitous people are, but how naive we can be!

    ‘Police-a koopiduvom, annada pongo maama’ nu solli kadavei saatharada vitutu!

    Yeah, true.. But for me, such gyanodhayam dawns only after it happens!

  6. Shanti said,

    February 23, 2010 at 10:45 am

    How did the watchman let them inside the building? Thy could have been some crooks also.. Remember the time when 2 boys came to sell some floor cleaning solution?

    Sadly the watchman had gone for a tea-break that day…. it seems they tried entering the building twice before…

  7. Citric Acid said,

    February 23, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    Windows.. Use the windows.. And when you encounter such people, stare blankly, speak in a foreign tongue.. if they speak Tamil, you use Telugu or Hindi or English or just stare through the window and say – phone call..meeting.. bye..bye.. Just try this and don’t go back to the door for quite a while.

    Genuine swamijis will never turn up at your house to bless without your invitation. This is Rule no. 1.

    Lol! Thanx! Shall try it next time. And you’re so true abt the genuine swamijis!!

  8. Vidya said,

    February 23, 2010 at 2:31 pm

    OMG! And you obliged by answering their questions? You must have turned them out at the first question!! God-men and all that!! Makes an interesting read on your blog though:-) Awaiting part II!

    😦 They caught me totally unawares! Hopefully I’ll be wiser in future!

  9. maxdavinci said,

    February 24, 2010 at 10:05 am

    cheating, where is the next part? suspense is not good ok!

    max! 🙂 your wish is my command! here it is!

  10. swamiji said,

    February 24, 2010 at 12:44 pm

    padmajav
    This suspense is too much to bear. Please don’t dupe us by ending this abruptly

    no sir, i hope didn’t!

  11. November 7, 2014 at 10:34 am

    […] up and having my own share of such frauds like this and this and this, I still haven’t learnt my lesson. I suddenly remebered this driver […]


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